In the Mix with Aaliyah Miller

I was either four or five when I was first called a nigger. I was outside playing in my front yard when a car drove by and a male passenger yelled the word from the car window quickly followed by a glass bottle that smashed on the concrete. Lucky for me I wasn’t hurt. Confused but not hurt. When I was in kindergarten I quickly learned our head teacher preferred the white kids to the black and brown ones in her class. To her I was a problem student. She even recommended to my mom I should be transferred to a class for kids who have learning disabilities. Lucky for me I had a mom who challenged the recommendation and had me tested. I didn’t have a learning disability, I was hyperactive. When I was 13, my mom bought her first home in the east end section of a neighborhood in Waterbury. I think we may have been one of the first black families to move into this area. This was in the early 90s. I remember being followed by a police car as I walked all the way to a friend...

When I look back at history I don’t think there has ever been a time when it’s been easy to be a woman. Even in the bible, Eve gets the blame for bringing sin to Adam. Fast forward to today and we still see mixed messages about how women are valued in our society. The media coverage of movements like #MeToo, #TimesUp, as well as stories about pay disparity and inequity are constant reminders that while we’ve seen change on many fronts, the bitter reality is a lot more needs to be done to raise the grade in how women are paid, treated, and valued in our culture. I’m sure you have these stats but they’re worth noting: In the U.S. women make up 51% of voters, yet women make up 20% or less in the U.S. Congress and Senate As of 2016, women now hold a paltry 4.2% of CEO positions in America’s 500 biggest companies In 2016, more women earned bachelor’s degrees, yet women still get underpaid for the same job as their male counterpart Today, on average, a woman earns 79 cents for eve...

"Each one, teach one." - An African proverb The African proverb above has a strong significance in my life. It's significance is two-fold; historical and practical. According to Wikipedia, the short yet powerful phrase, "originated in the United States during slavery , when Africans were denied education , including learning to read . Many if not most enslaved people were kept in a state of ignorance about anything beyond their immediate circumstances which were under control of owners, the law makers and authorities. When an enslaved person learned or was taught to read, it became his duty to teach someone else, spawning the phrase "Each one teach one." From a practical stand point I've been impacted by those who have embraced this proverb. Since I was a kid, individuals have helped to educate and influence me by putting this proverb into action. At the early age of five I was learning new skills, being encouraged, and mentored to by women l...

“I don't want a Black History Month. Black history is American history.”   ~Morgan Freeman Today we kick off Black History Month. During the month of February our nation acknowledges the contributions by black Americans. While I think it’s important to recognize, as a person of color I have mixed emotions about the value our society gets from this national acknowledgement. The high-level view during the month makes me feel like it’s a PC way our society and culture checks the box for addressing conversations and issues relevant to black Americans.   We pay tribute to a few civil rights icons, their contributions, and remember why their actions are still relevant and matter today. However, it’s just scratching at the service. It doesn’t get to the “pink elephant” in the room, racism, its 400-year plus legacy, or the detrimental effects that still weigh heavy on our public and private institutions and the lives of all Americans. Having difficult conversations ...

Akilah and Zak continue to make sense of the world. At 17 months our worlds are finally beginning to intersect verbally. Over the last four months they began pointing to things and attempting to say words like clock, dog and baba (Father in Arabic).  Now we say it and they try to repeat. We still get a fair amount of baby babble and twin speak, but they’re vigorously working at expanding their vocabulary. It’s amazing to watch, even when they’re being defiant. In addition to expanding their vocabulary they’re also asserting themselves and getting a kick out of pushing our buttons and being defiant. What’s the most popular word in our house with them? If you guessed “No,” you’d be right. They want to be in and out of everything, grabbing our smart phones or the remote control. Whatever they can get their hands on. These days my mom is constantly saying no to them them. Akilah and Zak mimic their grammy. When they do it sounds like a baby remix of Destiny Ch...

In today’s world you never know when a crisis is going to hit. I watch organizations and brands struggle with this publicly and as a communications professional, it’s one of those things I hope and pray won’t happen to me. However, in a culture dominated by a 24-hour news cycle and social media, the likelihood is not if but when. How a company or organization acts or doesn’t act when a crisis hits will have lasting effects. We have best practices that help inform how we should proactively respond, yet somehow organizations still miss the importance of being transparent, showing empathy, and being apologetic. In my home state of Connecticut, the University of Hartford has made national news with what seems like their inadequate handling of alleged racism between two students. In the video linked, you’ll notice the story headline highlights “bullying,” but as this story has evolved and more facts have been reported, Brianna Rae Brochu, the student accused of ha...

“Try not to become a man of success. Rather become a man of value.” ― Albert Einstein   I really love the above quote from Einstein. In two simple sentences, he covers a lot of ground. His words help push my own thinking on the differences between success and value. When it comes to your work, what percentage of your time is focused on winning and having your project be a success? Is it more or less than 50 percent? Take a minute to think about your answer. Now here’s your follow-up question. Do you prioritize success over value and if so, what may you be missing as a result? Einstein’s quote reminds me to press pause on my notion to drive for success and instead think of how my work helps to bring value to others. How we understand and perceive the differences matters to how we deliver on our individual goals. When you hear of success, recognition tends to follow. While our reputations are built on successful outcomes if we’re not careful, success can inflate our ...