In the Mix with Aaliyah Miller

Why compare yourself with others? No one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you.” ~ Unknown We live in a competitive society. We work in a competitive industry. Most of us at some time in our lives probably played a competitive sport. Competition is a part of our lives and studies suggest that we learn to be competitive at an early age. When I was younger I used to perform on a gymnastic team. At gymnastic meets I would go to my assigned rotation after I warmed up and stretched. While waiting my turn it I often common checked out the other team to see what their skills were. This would either make me happy or doubt myself; it all depended on the skill level of the other gymnasts. When I first joined the team I was 10 and my skills were pretty basic. At my first gymnastic meet I was both nervous and excited. There were a few girls around my age, but performing tricks at a higher level than me. Doubt began to set in as I watched them. Aisha, one of my se

We had a very lively discussion in the blog post, “ Are you actively listening ?” I appreciated the comments and insights you shared. After I read through your comments I thought it would be helpful to also look at how we can be better at active listening in our online communications.  Whether communicating with a person face-to-face or online, it’s important to remember that effective communication is two-way communication. This can be hard when we’re using technology because we  see a person’s emotion or response. Kaitlin Duck Sherwood’s, A Beginners Guide to Effective Email summarizes the problems we experience with online communication: “Email also does not convey emotions nearly as well as face-to-face or even telephone conversations. It lacks vocal inflection, gestures, and a shared environment. Your correspondent may have difficulty telling if you are serious or kidding, happy or sad, frustrated or euphoric. Sarcasm is particularly dangerous to use in email.” Alth

During your one-on-one meetings do you have the undivided attention of the person sitting across from you? Did you give them your full attention?  Active listening seems easy, yet most of us aren’t as good as we think.  Hear What People Are Saying Listening to others is important, but according to Mind Tools , a website that provides tools and resources to help individual become better leaders, reports that, “we remember between 25 percent and 50 percent of what we hear.” Given that we communicate with people every day, we’re missing a lot of important information. Becoming an active listener helps to improve productivity and our ability to lead and influence others. Research suggests that individuals that are active listeners are more effective at communicating and managing conflict. Becoming an Active Listener If you want to be a better basketball player you practice. If you want to give your best speech, you practice. If you want to be a better listener,